Is it a crime to rhyme all the time!? – Overdose of English

I’m mental. I’m weird. That’s not news to any of you.

To all those of you who think I’ve an English obsession, let me introduce you to some further craziness!

– I have this habit of finding rhyming words! So if you ask me to write a poem, I won’t rest in peace till I find a damn rhyme to every single ending word! If I don’t, then no poem!

This morning I set off on a rhyme-athon while​ talking to PP who had woken up barely minutes ago! It began with him asking me where’s the ‘honey’ and I took it on from there! Money, sunny, bunny, funny(I thought I was!), etc. I even used ‘Panni’ from Malayalam; meaning a pig, which I’m sure PP called ME in his mind for the torture!

Continuing with this morning, I learnt an English lesson while putting on my Tee –
‘Never try to read words from your Tee upside down!’
I got a mini attack when I read ‘impatient’ as ‘impotent’. Long silence.

– While getting dropped off at the station by PP, I started to pronounce ‘Edgbaston’ in my mind! The first time I heard that word was when India lost to Pakistan at the Edgbaston Cricket Ground! Trust me to come up with words out of nowhere!
I tried Eg-bas-ton, Ed-bas-ton and cursed the British for putting unnecessary silent alphabets! That got me wondering about ‘pneumonia’. Why complicate the damn spelling when the disease by itself is complicated!?

That reminds me, I forgot to mention the name of the Luxury Cruise I went on in my ‘Dubai Trip’ blog! Well, I must have consciously not revealed it because it was one hell of a name! ‘BATEAUX’!
How do you spell and pronounce it!?
I’m damn sure the words ‘buttocks’ or ‘botox’ ring a bell! 😛
That’s why the non-disclosure.

That’s not all! Other grammar Qs that always pop up in my head are:

1) Can I use a comma before an and!? If yes, when!?
2) Can I start a sentence with a ‘but’?
3) When to use ‘that’ and when to use ‘which’? Are they replaceable?
4) Do I put the full stop before the apostrophe or after?
5) What about the exclamation mark!?

Does anyone of you take offence to a punctuation mark being out of place!? I mean, imagine my blog being boycotted being banned over one such mistake! If yes, do let me know. I need to tread cautiously 😛

That’s it for today!

Cheers!